In Britain: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
In Germany: You have two cows. You re-engineer them, so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
In France: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
In Italy: You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are, so you go for lunch.
In Japan: You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are one tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
In Switzerland: You have two thousand cows. None of them belongs to you, but you charge for keeping them.
In Brazil: You have two cows. You enter into partnership with an American company. Soon you have two thousand cows and the American company declares bankruptcy.
In Russia: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have twenty. You count again and you learn you only have two. Then you hit the bottle.
In China: You have two cows. You have two hundred people milking them. You declare full employment and high productivity.
In India: You have two cows. You worship both of them.
In Somaliland: You have two cows. One is taken by 571 and the other starves to death.